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***Roast Watch*** Joey Barton Strikes Again

Monday, 31 December 2007

Joey, Joey Joey, when are you going to sort your life out? As if thumping and assaulting people wasn't bad enough, you have now decided to try and hassle women instead. You stupid idiot.

Thank you to the Sun for keeping us abreast (ahem) of Joey's latest shameful antics

Boozy Barton boob rub shame

Low blow ... Barton gets a bit too close

Low blow ... Barton gets a bit too close

SOCCER badboy Joey Barton is shamed again after being filmed burying his face in a busty brunette’s BOOBS.

Barton — in jail over an alleged assault last week — upset American beauty Catherine Payne with his lewd antics in a club.

Miffed Catherine rebuffed his boozy attempts to get her on the dancefloor.

Breast pal ... Catherine with friend and Nicky Butt

Breast pal ... Catherine with friend and Nicky Butt

In the mobile phone footage, Barton is seen repeatedly shoving his face into Catherine’s cleavage because she is wearing a plunging black dress.

As she moves away, Barton, swigging from a bottle, puts his arm around her and attempts to kiss her — but gets knocked back again.

Lewd antics ... Barton

Lewd antics ... Barton

As Catherine walks away he tries to rub his head in her boobs again, almost falling over in the process.

She shoves him off but he yanks her hair THREE TIMES as she turns away.

The incident, at the Loft Nightclub in Keswick, was captured by a witness on his phone camera.

Barton, 25, and Newcastle United pals, including Nicky Butt, were in the Lake District for a team-building exercise, staying at a hotel where Catherine ran a beauty salon.

The witness said: “I saw Barton hassling the girl. She tried to politely brush him off but in the end had to walk away. He was bang out of order.

The incident came just weeks before Barton was arrested last Thursday after a 5.30am bust-up in Liverpool.

He has been charged with common assault and affray. Barton is remanded in custody until Thursday.

Last night he was offered advice by ex-England soccer star Stan Collymore — famed for thumping TV’s Ulrika Jonsson and sex with strangers.

Urging Barton NOT to end up like him, Collymore, 36, said: “If you want to see how things can go wrong, read my story and read it carefully.”

Sunil

1 comments

Shut Your Mouth!

Here is a simply hilarious video taken from the Sheffield United Vs Crystal Palace game on Saturday.

When you have to shut your own fans up by pulling a hat over their head you know you have problems. To be fair to the guy in front, not being able to see his Sheffield United team play may be a blessing in disguise. The look on the kid's face is priceless when he has just realised what has happened



Sunil

3

Premiership Ups & Downs...

Sunday, 30 December 2007

Well, the last weekend of Premiership action of 2007 didn't disappoint..here are the latest Ups & Downs...

Also a mention though to Phil O'Donnell, the Motherwell midfielder who passed away during a game on Saturday afternoon, a truly tragic event. A reminder to all of us that there are more important things than football.

Going Up

Goals, Goals, Goals

Well, after the Xmas festivities, we could perhaps have forgiven the players if they were slightly hungover this weekend. However, this theory was thrown complete out the window as the Premiership served up a veritable orgy of goalmouth action (and not a roasting in sight). There were goals galore which delighted the hordes who had braved it in the terrible weather.

So what is the reason for this sudden goal rush? Well, I have noticed that this upsurge has rather spookily co-incided with the disappearance of Alan Hansen from our screens on Match of the Day. Normally, defenders would be scared shitless of making errors in games, knowing that the Scotsman would hand out the roasting live on National Television later on that evening. However, Hansen has now been replaced by Alan Shearer for the time being. In comparison, Shearer has nowhere near the class of Hansen as a pundit. The Geordie permanently sits on the fence and loves to state the obvious. However, as a former striker he loves goals more than Hansen and the players obviously have realised they will get more praise for goalscoring exploits when Shearer is on MOTD. Whatever the actual reason though, I'm not complaining. Long may it continue.

Berbatov

The Bulgarian showed his class as his 4 goal salvo sealed victory Spurs in a simply ridiculous game against Reading at White Hart Lane. A mixture of the frustrating and audacious, Spurs simply must hold onto this man during the transfer window if they are to continue their slow ascent up their table.

Terrace Humour

I went to see my team play a game on Saturday afternoon and at half time a home supporter asked his girlfriend to marry her in front of the whole crowd. She accepted.

The fans response?

"You don't know what you're doing!"

Simply priceless

Eduardo

Prince scored his first Premiership goals of the campaign as Arsenal resorted to Wimbledon style tactics to overcome Everton after an insipid first half display. Who says that Arsenal don't have a plan B eh? The best finisher in the Premiership?

Kenwyne Jones

Powerhouse display from the big man to help secure a crucial three points for the Black Cats.

Bentley

Is there a more talented English football player in the Premiership right now?

Going Down

Ronaldo and Man Utd

The cheeky winker perhaps received some karma for his recent diving exploits as his horrendous penalty miss proved costly in a sloppy display from the Champions. They were undone by two set pieces to throw the title race back wide open. Rio proved he is not the only person who can hand out the roasting as he got merked by his own brother Anton, who had come on as a substitute.

Fabregas

Not to be outdone by Emmanuel Eboue in terms of being an annoying little shit the little Spaniard reached new depths as his over-reaction against Mikel Arteta resulted in the mercurial playmaker being sent off. Arteta's arm was undoubtedly in Fabregas' face but the way he went down as if he had been caught by a sniper was borderline scandalous. What makes it more unforgivable is the fact that the two are meant to be bum chums, with Xabi Alonso completing the trinity. Can you honestly believe that someone would get their mate sent off like that? It's almost as bad as cock blocking your own mate and then sneaking off with the girl at the end of the night. It remains to be seen whether the two midfielders will kiss and make up in the future.


Liverpool

If Liverpool harbour any ambitions of winning the Premiership they need to...(insert footballing cliche). It's getting a bit boring talking about the abilities that Liverpool lack, the same problems we discuss every season. This was probably a must win game, and how Liverpool did not win this game only god will know. They were totally totally dominant, and if not for the simply outstanding Richard Dunne and the often awful Kuyt it could have been a rout. Many will question Rafa again, why were his tactics so negative early on? What took Liverpool so long to get going? Are they really scared like Hicks suggested? Who knows, but there needs to be a turnaround soon, or it will most definitely be over for another season.

The Chelski linesman

Perhaps Roman handed out a cheeky bribe to the linesman as he inexplicably kept his flag down as Kalou slammed home after being a mere 5 yards offside. How else could the striker have possibly scored otherwise? The result was harsh on Newcastle as the Chelksi home bandwagon rolls on.

Robbie Keane

As much as I love the Irishman as a footballer I think its time to pass on the penalty taking duties.

Reading

Scoring 4 goals and still losing is not an achievement to be be proud of really.

Pompey

As said a couple of weeks ago, watch out for the Pompey slide. They cannot score at home and will soon be without half their team. Don't be surprised to see them slip into the relegation dogfight after Xmas.

Derby

A missed penalty at 1-0 for Derby was punished almost instantaneously by a Rovers equalizer within a matter of seconds. Derby went from near ecstasy to total agony . A bit like banging a bird then realising that she is in fact a man. Like Begbie in Trainspotting, Derby never really recovered and the inspirational Bentley sealed the comeback to leave the Rams firmly rooted to the bottom of the League.

Sunil

2

***Twat Watch***

Saturday, 29 December 2007


Upon reviewing the constant foolish off the field behaviour of our favourite football players, I felt the need to introduce a new column to On The Bench, some way to highlight the idiocies of some of our idols.

There is a common saying, that you can take the boy out of the ghetto, but you can't take the ghetto out of the boy. Joey Barton is simply the epitome of this, and he continues to ruin all his talent by being involved in more off the field shenanigans. When he is not beating up his teamates, or moaning about passionate fans, Joey Barton can be found on the streets of Liverpool getting into fights with random locals. Here is a link to his latest misdemeanor.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/7162323.stm

What a twat, some may call that a harsh judgement, others may see it as perfectly apt. But seriously what excuse does a professional footballer, who is supposed to be a shining light to youngsters around the country, have for being out clubbing and getting into yet another brawl, and this isn't a one off incident. Thankfully Joey will be learning a very harsh less over the new year as he spends his days moping in a nice warm jail cell. Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy. I know Joey is an avid reader of On The Bench, but unfortunately he is behind bars and I doubt he has wi-fi access, but happy new year Joey.

3

Championship Corner

Thursday, 27 December 2007

As the Premiership looks set to enter into two race race its time to look at the Championship, where things are a looking a lot more interesting at the turn of the year as the season enters its halfway point. Lets start by looking at the top....


I often joke with my friends that WBA are the "Arsenal of the Championship" but this is often met by howls of derision. Whilst my claim may be slightly exaggerated it can't be denied that the Baggies are one of the most entertaining teams in the country right now. The sale of Kamara, Koumas and Davies (have any of them really bettered themselves...?) ripped the spine out of Tony Mowbray's team but he has done an excellent rebuilding job to send the Baggies top at Xmas. Liverpool fans may think they have the "best midfield in the world" but I think that West Brom may have the best midfield in the Championship. Gera, Greening, Brunt, Koren, Texeira and Morrison are formidable and ally that to the evergreen Phillips upfront with a helping hand from Ishmael "roasting" Miller then the future is looking bright for the Baggies. They are the top scorers in the country at the moment and their whopping goal difference is testimony to the football they play.

Joint top with the Baggies are the the Glory Hornet Boys. If WBA are the Rolls Royce of the division then Watford are the Morris Minor, but at the end of the day, they still get you from A to B like the Rolls Royce does, though perhaps in less style. Watford are horrible to watch, make no bones about it but they grind out results and in King, Ellington and McAnuff they do possess a very real goal threat. It remains to be seen if they have the squad depth to maintain a title challenge but it is likely they will be up there come the end of the season, providing they sort out their home form.

Contiuning the car analogy, and third place Stoke City are like a Monster truck, they will just stomp all over you. A friend who went to the Stoke City Vs West Brom games said that it was more like a WWE wrestling match with Stoke City turning each game into a playground fight. However, the table doesn't lie and it cannot be denied that that their style of football is effective. In Ricardo Fuller they have one of the Leagues most fearsome strikers as recently shown in his single handed demolition of the Baggies. If Pulis can strengthen his squad in the transfer window then you can sure they will be around those top two promotion spots come May.

Bristol City and Charlton have stuttered in recent weeks but they remain just a few points adrift. Gary Johnson has done an exceptional job at Bristol City having seen his team promoted from League One only last season. Alan Pardew is one of the most experienced managers around at getting teams out of this division and his nouse could prove crucial at the end of the season for Charlton

A word also for pre-season favourites Sheffield United. Bryan Robson looks set to prove once again that he is a shite manager as he takes a team which nearly survived from the Premiership, added to the squad and yet somehow managed to turn them into an average mediocre side. The former Man Utd legend is a bit like a lame horse when it comes to management, he just needs to be put out of his misery.

Turning to the other end of the table and Colchester United look doomed. They had to sell Iwelumo, Cureton and Varney in the summer, their whole strikeforce basically. That's a bit like having your legs removed and still hoping that you can drive a car(although I believe that actually IS possible these days). Either way, you get the point I am trying to make. Colchester are up shit creek without a paddle, but so was that Darwin bloke who came back from the dead so perhaps they can still survive. BOOM BOOM.

QPR have hired an Italian manager who cannot speak English to try and help them stave of relegation after the previous Englishman had a nightmare (sound familiar England fans...?). I think that they could put the Super Mario Brothers in charge and they would still have more chance of surviving to be honest.

Preston sacked Paul Simpson in an attempt to revive their fortunes. However, they will soon realise that changing manager when you have a shit team will make no difference whatsoever. It's a bit like Lewis Hamilton starting to drive for Toyota and expecting him win the title. I don't think so.

Sunil

0

Premiership Ups & Downs....

Sunday, 23 December 2007

After a week of roasting in Manchester it was back to the bread and butter of the Premiership this weekend. Here are the latest ups and downs as Arsenal and Man Utd look set to enter into a two horse race for the Premiership

Going Up



Fernando Torres

Whilst Liverpool's title challenge has faltered in recent week it is clear and obvious to everyone that El Nino is on fire at the moment and is probably the best striker in the Premiership. In recent years, even the likes of Bergkamp, Henry and Drogba have taken their time to bed in to the speed and pace of the Premiership and then you have players like Sheva who look completely like a fish out of water. Torres however, has settled in immediately and looks already as though his price tag was completely justified.

It may be a cliche, but Torres appears to have everything in his locker. Poise, balance, a great turn of pace, two great feet and decent ability in the air. Basically he has everything that his hapless partner Dirk Kuyt doesn't have.

Arsenal & Man Utd

Sometimes it takes alot more luck than skill, to win a Premiership title, and both these teams got their fair share of it over the weekend.

Derby

Two goals in one away game? Surely not. Next thing you know referees will be giving penalties to the away team at Old Trafford and Chelsea players will accept every decision made by the men in black...I wouldn't hold your breath though.

Hilario

He may well be a figure of fun but his fine one handed save from Santa Cruz made sure that Chelsea held onto three points in this tricky tie at Ewood. Apart from that he was pretty shite though so unless Cech makes an immediate return expect Chelski's goals against record to take a bit of a pounding in the next few weeks.

Bentley

Another eye catching display from the midfielder who surely must now get a chance for England on the right hand side. He appears to have learnt a lot from Wenger's foreign legion with great technique and vision which is such a rare commodity in England players these days.

Going Down

Lycra

Perhaps after all the hype from last week's Grand Slam Sunday footballers think that they ought to begin looking like the wrestlers from the other side of the the Atlantic. It seems as though lycra tops underneath the jersey are the latest fashion accessories for footballer. Don't be surprised to see Rooney and Tevez soon featuring in an advert for the latest skin tight leggings. Come on lads, ditch the gloves and lycra and lets not forget this is a man's game.

Robbie Keane

On Saturday morning on Football Focus, the wee Irishman was showing doing his bit for footballers (not by roasting someone) by going to a local children's ward to had out Xmas presents to unfortunate children. To Keane's horror about 99% of the children were Arsenal fans, but being the good sport he is he didn't take exception and made sure all the kids for their presents. Thankfully for Arsenal fans his kindness extended to Saturday afternoon as his penalty miss howler was followed almost instantaneously by Arsenal taking the lead at the other end. Keane's previous penalty record was pretty exceptional and it just shows was pressure can do to you as the Irishman shows that perhaps he has balls like cashew nuts after all.

Stephen Pienaar

Robbie Keane wasn't the only player handing out premature Xmas gifts as the Everton midfielder's moment of madness allowed the Cheeky Winker to steal the points at Old Trafford and move them to within one point of Arsenal. What quite Pienaar was thinking I don't know as he showed all the intelligence of an amoeba to bring down Giggs just as Everton looked as they were going to close out the game.

Newcastle

Big Sam can say what hes like but this was another embarrassing result for Newcastle as they let in 2 goals against a team who had only scored 1 away goal all season. Newcastle's defence shows no sign of improving and the Magpies already have that mid-table mediocrity look about them.

Dean Whitehead and Sunderland

I know that things can be tough at the bottom but crashing into the home mascot is no way to take out your frustration. However, the Reading lion had the last laugh as the home side snatched a winner in the last minute thanks to a dodgy last minute goal. Roy Keane spent £35m in the summer but is still facing relegation scrap which will prove a huge test of his managerial talents

Goal line technology, the BBC and Sky

After all the fuss around goal line technology, the BBC and Sky's super duper video imaging software could not come to an agreement as to whether the goal line decisions over the weekend had crossed the line or not. If two TV companies with bags of time, money and technology cant figure it out, then what hope for the poor linesman? Whats the point of goal line technology if it doesn't even work?

Sunil

43

***Roast Watch*** Micah Richards Mobile Phone Special

Well, well well, its looks like the red half of Manchester aren't the only ones who have recently been involved a roasting scandal. After the shennanigans of Manchester United players at the "roast party" , news has leaked that Micah Richards has recently been involved of some roasting of his own. The Manchester City defender has made the headlines as him and his pal filmed themselves on a mobile phone having sex with a woman in a disabled toilet. His friend has not been officially named but I have to confess that I am almost a 100% sure that it is striker Ishmael Miller, who is currently on loan at West Bromwich Albion. Miller has spent the last few weeks sidelined by injury so its good to see that he was making excellent use of his spare time.

Micah writes his own column on the BBC Football website, which in all honesty is pretty fucking boring. Perhaps if he made the readers aware of what he actually got up to in his spare time then he might generate a bit more interest. It looks as though perhaps him and Miller are trying to become the new Dwight and Andy, who were renowned for their teamwork off the pitch back in the late 90s.

Here is the article courtesy of the News of the World.

England ace in sex roast shame

New shocking video reveals two players in vile orgy


ENGLAND ace Micah Richards has been caught ‘roasting' a young girl fan in a sick sex video passed to the News of the World.

The Manchester City star and a Premier League pal filmed themselves on a mobile phone during the depraved hotel toilet romp in the latest scandal to rock English soccer.

Richards is today exposed as a vile animal captured on video "roasting" a teenage fan in a toilet with a pal.

The star player and his Premier League friend, grinning broadly with debauched pleasure, have sex with the girl at the same time while filming themselves on a mobile phone.

The sickening video of Manchester City defender Richards was handed to the News of the World in the week that soccer's reputation hit rock bottom after allegations of rape and roasting at rival club Man United's Christmas party.

The film of Richards' roasting—a sick act which involves one man having sex with a woman from behind while she gives a second oral sex—was passed on to friends' mobiles by the swaggering pair.

In the clip, the 19-year-old player, one of England's brightest young stars, smiles directly at the camera over the girl's back.

Dressed in a white T-shirt, jeans and a leather jacket, he shakes his head around as his pal films him with his trousers down behind the girl.

Richards is wearing distinctive jewellery including a silver ring, earrings and necklace.

Then the other smiling soccer player, who is naked from the waist up, moves the phone lens onto his own private parts in the most sickening footage —and also films the girl giving him oral sex, reflected in a large mirror in what appears to be a hotel's disabled toilet.

The girl—a brunette naked from the waist down—moans with pleasure as the players shout: "Does that feel good?" Wearing just a black wool jumper and expensive black earrings, she doesn't stop pleasuring the men—even when a mobile phone rings.

Both players then burst into laughter and one of them says: "Who's ringing you at this time?" Towards the end of the 87 seconds of footage one of the men mumbles something to the other, causing him to shout "F*** that!"

Then as the sleazy session ends, one of the players says something that forces the girl to yell an indignant "Hey!"

Sources who have seen the video reveal the man with Richards—who played for his team against Aston Villa yesterday—is another Premier League player.

The footage is believed to have been shot in Manchester city centre in the last five weeks, near the time England embarrassingly failed to qualify for the European Championships with their defeat to Croatia at Wembley.

One pal told us: "Micah and his mate have been boasting about what they got up to with the girl, they think it is hilarious. You can tell they are both loving it.

"Most of my friends have now got it on their phones. But you can't help thinking they are treating the girl like a piece of meat.

"Even when one of their phones rings they don't stop, they just have a laugh and carry on. They don't really care to be honest, it's just another girl."

Another pal said Richards— said to be seeking an improved £14 million contract at City—is regularly seen in Manchester bars with his roasting accomplice.

He said: "They are so tight it is unbelievable, they do everything together. They have got a lot of money and they know it.

"They dress in flash jewellery and rap star clothes. To be honest they wind a lot of people up but the girls seem to love it."

Richards might care more when he realises how the scandal will put his budding England career at risk under new coach Fabio Capello—a renowned disciplinarian who demands the best behaviour from his players.

Italian Capello has warned that he will subject all England players to a month of intense scrutiny before deciding whether they are deserving of a place in his first squad.

He said: "A place in the national squad has to be deserved, and it will be based on behaviour, play on the field and attitude."

Richards was the youngest defender ever to be called up for England and is now a team regular alongside captain John Terry.

His behaviour will be particularly heartbreaking for his proud dad Lincoln who came to Britain from the West Indies 40 years ago as a seven-year-old. Despite bringing Micah up in the tough Chapeltown area of Leeds, he was sure his son would make a success of his life.

Earlier this year Lincoln said: "There are two roads you can go down, bad or good. I was never concerned about Micah, it was not in his nature."

The player even sees himself as a role model, saying: "To anyone from my area, I always give the advice that if you really want something, just concentrate on it and try to fulfil your dreams."

But our sordid footage reveals the Aston Martin-driving Micah has been drawn into the depraved lifestyle that is tarnishing our national game—and which erupted onto front pages all last week.

Budding Manchester United star Jonny Evans was arrested on Tuesday after a 26-year-old nurse claimed she had been raped at the team's party in the swish Great John Street Hotel. He denies the accusation.

Then it was claimed another girl was roasted at the bash by around five or six revellers—including three Man United players. Girls mingling with players in the hotel complained of being groped "like pieces of meat" by boozed-up stars.

Manchester United boss Alex Ferguson is now attempting to call time on the behaviour of his overpaid stars.

He has banned any repeat of last week's party where more than 100 carefully selected pretty girls were invited, but wives and girlfriends were banned.

Organisers are understood to have trawled the social networking site Facebook to find attractive young women to attend the party. But at the last minute it was feared there were not enough girls and calls were made to local lap dancing clubs to make up the numbers.

All United's players were at the party apart from Ronaldo, who was at an awards ceremony.

Roasting was first highlighted in 2003 when a 17-year-old girl claimed she was gang-raped by four men— including two Premiership stars—at the Grosvenor House Hotel in London.

The two stars were interviewed by detectives but the case was dropped because of lack of evidence.

And in January 2004, three Leicester City players were questioned about the alleged assault and rape of three prostitutes at Spain's luxury La Manga hotel complex. Paul Dickov, 32, Keith Gillespie, 30, and Frank Sinclair, 34, spent six days in jail before they were all cleared by a Spanish court.

0

Random musings from the past week...

Saturday, 22 December 2007

1- Is Capello the right man for the job, yes he has the credentials and all the awards McCalren could only dream of, but can even a man of his incredible abilities rescue English Football? He is definitely one of the best candidates out there and will certainly improve the England team 1000 fold, but seriously how difficult is that after having one of the worse managers in the history of football and not even Capello will be able to teach the team to pass. Capello will certainly need to learn a few select English phrases such as : -

"Frank put the pizzas down"
"Catch it Paul, Catch It"
"Seriously, Why cant you clowns pass a football"
"Stevie, this is not Hollywood"

2 - After Seeing yesterdays performances by Momo Sissoko and Voronin, I think we can officially close the cult fan clubs they had when the arrived. Don't let the door hit you on the way out lads.

3 - Who are worse the English Football Team or the English Cricket Team?

4 - Have Spurs really turned the corner, or will they get perpetually owned by Arsenal when they get raped in the London derby on Saturday(how inevitable is this) and then knocked out of their only real chance of silverware when they take on Arsenal's "kids" at the emirates.

5- This Arsenal's "kids" nonsense, its bollocks really isn't it? Every team has young players, who play in the Carling cup.

6 - Was anyone else happy to see Crouch's simply hilarious attempt at trying to end Mikel's career? I would never have expected that from him.

7 - Shevchenko scored!! Does this mean he has finally found his level?

8 - How did Leon win the X-Factor?

9 - What the hell were the Man Utd players thinking? So basically they organised a bash, invited as many random girls as they probably could, and provided them with enough alcohol to ensure that they forget the evenings festivities. Whose idea was it? Well, apparently Rio was behind the whole debacle which has left Sir Alex absolutely fuming, maybe he was angry because he wasn't invited. Sounded like an an absolute roast fest.

10 - How predictable was seeing the ultimate whinger Lawrie Sanchez leave Fulham? How did he expect to do well after spending all of his money on decent championship players?

6

**Roast Watch** Festive Special

Friday, 21 December 2007

Well, well well, at a time when many people will be pondering what methods to use to roast their turkeys this Christmas, footballers continue their all year round roasting campaign with even more shocking news coming out of the Man Utd camp.


THE girl “roasted” by Manchester United players at their Christmas party bragged drunkenly afterwards: They said I was great in bed.

The pretty reveller, aged around 19, had just had sex with five or six men, including three United players.

Their jeers and her moans were overheard by a sickened party guest. She said yesterday:

I was upstairs in the hotel gossiping with a friend when I heard cheering and clapping noises coming from one of the rooms.

We could hear the voices of around five or six men - together with the groaning noises of a girl who was clearly having sex.

The men were shrieking like hyenas and shouting, ‘Get in there’. My mate and I sat shocked as it was so vile.

After a few minutes the men filed out of the room laughing, and rushed downstairs for more booze.

I recognised three of them as members of the Manchester United squad - one of them a well-known name.

Posh ... hotel where Man U players were involved in roasting

Posh ... hotel where Man U players were involved in roasting

The girl then came staggering out boasting she had just had sex with all the men.

She was clearly very drunk and very pretty, and probably about 19 years old.

I asked if she was OK and she said, ‘Yeah, of course. Why wouldn’t I be? They said I was a great shag’ and then she hobbled down the corridor.

She looked as if she was in a bit of pain. After that me and my mate left. I was shocked by the idea there had been an orgy at the party. It felt so sleazy.

Details of the sordid session at Manchester’s plush Great John Street Hotel on Monday night emerged following claims by a 26-year-old that she was raped at the bash.

Disgusted

The girl told police that Northern Ireland international Jonny Evans attacked her after she went upstairs with him following a dance.

Evans, 19, has denied the accusation, telling pals: “I didn’t do it.”

Cops have heard about grubby antics including beauties being passed around “like pieces of meat”.

Many revellers visited a casino and a pub before heading to the hotel.

Nearly 100 girls were there including models, ex-soap stars and well-known faces from Manchester’s party circuit. But there were no wives or girlfriends.

Last night the alleged rape victim remained in the Greater Manchester area as police continued to gather evidence and statements from her.

Red Devils ... club badge

Meanwhile United stars tried to put the party scandal behind them as they visited sick children.

Skipper Neville along with Scholes and Hargreaves cheered up kids at Booth Hall Children’s Hospital in Blackley, Manchester.

They handed out presents including one to little Huber Tanny, six.

Giggs and Rooney joined boxer Ricky “The Hitman” Hatton to raise money for charity at Royal Manchester Children’s Hospital.

Ricky, a keen fan of rivals Manchester City, wore a blue Santa hat while Wayne wore a red one as they gave a present to Josh Hodgin, 11.

The Old Trafford players make hospital visits every Christmas.


I'm confused by all this, why were some of the girls disgusted? You were invited to a party with no wives or girlfriends allowed, what were you honestly expecting, a civillised tea party? I love the way the Man Utd players think giving presents to children will vindicate them of any wrong doing. The girl said she heard people saying "get in there", what odds on her also hearing the immortal words "you got merked!!!!" Yes, we know you were there Rio.


2

I Love Dirk Kuyt....

Thursday, 20 December 2007

After the unfortunate events of Grand Slam Sunday, I then received this email from a mate of mine who supports Man Utd, have a read for yourself, it was aptly titled "I Love Dirk Kuyt".

"He epitomises everything about why your pathetic club won't win the title. Oh how I laughed every time he miscontrolled the ball....but don't worry, you've got Alonso coming back! Shudder!

Pathetic, utterly pathetic Kofi. Your big man bravado has yet again blown up in your face as your insignificant little club is out the title race before Xmas yet again - now it feels like Xmas..
.
I just love heading for our annual 3 points at Anfield where Fergie proves he's the master to Benitez's totally inept tactics...Oh we beat Marseilles to finish second in the easiest group in the Champions league, we're the greatest side on earth. F*cking laughable.

Now please, please take your Stevie "I go missing in every game against Man United" Gerrard and Fernando "I'm learning the Liverpool way about choking against Man United" Torres and f*ck off back to fight for third. You have an insignificant club who's only aspirations are to fluke yet another cup victory on penalties. Leave winning titles to the big boys.

Oh, and you Chelsea, you are not out of it yet, but that defeat makes it very, very tough. I know you're missing players, but you're gonna be missing a whole lot more in Jan...."