Worst Playacting Ever......Aww Did-umms

Last week's vote was a tight affair with a number of contenders throwing themselves forward, after only the slightest bit of contact, for the honour of being voted Worst Play Actor Ever.

In third place was everyone's not so favourite centre forward Andrei Shevchenko. To be fair to Sheva, he hasn't been throwing himself to the ground or diving like Joe Cole, but he has in fact spent the last two years pretending that he was a £30 million pound striker with one of the finest Champions League goalscoring records in history. Sheva has been absolutely terrible ever since he was signed by Mr Abramovich against Jose Mourinho's wishes and has shown little sign of returning to his prolific best. Everytime he runs he looks like he is treading through treacle and he resembles one of those large lumbering trees off Lord of the Rings. He has become Alan Hansen's favourite figure of fun and his terrible form shows no sign of abaiting.

In second place was Skullfaces ridiculous feigning of injury against Turkey in World Cup 2002. After Hakan Unsal childishly kicked the ball at Rivaldo's legs, the Brazilian grabbed his face as if he had been shot in the face. Cue Hakan Unsal receiving a much undeserved red card. To be fair to Rivaldo, after Felipe Scolari tried to justify the red card, the Skullface came clean

He said:

"Obviously I exaggerated the injury for the guy to be sent off.

"The ball hit my hand and my leg.

"It didn't hit me in the face but that kind of attitude must not be allowed on the pitch.

"He deserved a red card."

I was about to say fair play to Rivaldo for his honesty but when I looked at the video again I struggled to have any respect for the man on this particular occasion.

What made the incident more bizarre was the fact that the linesman was standing right next to him to oversee any potential foul play. After much extensive research and study, I have managed to provide this accurate picture of the assistant referee.















Unsurprisingly perhaps, the winner of last week's vote was Dida of Milan. I am sure you have all seen the incident by now so I am not going to go into too much details other than to say that the guy is an absolute big girls blouse. I think that for incidents like this, that the person involved should be brought onto the screen to explain their actions, because that would be the ultimate humiliation. I would say that Dida's dive was probably the worst acting performance since Jar Jar Binks appeared in Star Wars, and he wasn't even real. The guy who ran on the pitch must have been disappointed that he only tapped him on the face. If he knew Dida was gonna react that way then I bet he wishes he properley punched the hapless Brazilian to the floor and got his value for money.













Dida's dive was bad enough , but then to call out a stretcher to be taken off as if he had got a broken neck or something was quite simply astonishing. David Busst would not be impressed. Thankfully he has been punished for his actions which should stop him doing the same again in the future. For me the best punishment would be to cast him in a gay porno flick. Perhaps then he will consider whether he really wants to be going down as easily.....

Dida.....You are officially the worst play actor ever.

Sunil