Things I Miss About Football..

It seems that a lot of people are not talking about football these days.  Whether it be racism, gayism (ok not sure if that's an actual word) or other outrageous incidents not even related to the beautiful game.  Here are a few things which I think should be brought back/or removed to help bring the English game back to the glory days of the 90s.

1) The Pink Paper - This is one for people who are over the age of 25 mainly and what used to be the highlight of my Saturday night.  Before the advent of the internet and Sky TV the quickest way to get the match report (apart from CEEFAX) was this evening paper which would publish your local teams report almost 2 hours after full time.  Incroyable!  The paper would also provide a fixture list and the results so far as well as the tables at the end of the day.  All for about 30p. What more could you want? You can shove BBC live text commentary up your a*se!

2) Confetti - I may be wrong on this one but in my experience not many  English fans still tear up bits of paper at the top of the stand and chuck them into the air as the players emerge from the kick off.  A wonderful opening match ritual

3) Scrap hand shakes for good - Before players would emerge from the tunnel and charge towards their half of the pitch before the obligatory chants from the crowd to get the game going.  Now thanks to the powers that be we have to watch the players all massaging each others hands in what is quite simply a pointless exercise.  Why have player handshakes when a they might be elbowing, stamping or racially abusing each other later on? Answers on a postcard please

4) Keep injury time a secret - Before recent times we never knew how much injury time there was at a game heading into the final minutes.  Why did I prefer this you may ask?  Anyone who experienced hanging on 1 minute from the end to a single goal lead would simply be sh*tting themselves at this point as they had no idea how long was left. Thousands of people would be whistling/screaming for the ref to blow up creating an almighty crescendo. This made the feeling when the whistle went even more glorious.  Now you can simply sit in comfort thinking "only one minute to go...". BORING

5) Teams just going all out to win  - This is an obvious one but the cost of losing is so great financially that teams now just daren't go all out to win and instead many are force to try not to lose.  In the old days, everyone just used to go for it, even if it meant taking a pasting.

Can anyone else think of anything that they really miss about football....?

Sunil

Bonkers Barton Has Crossed The Line

Did you know that the name Joey Barton is an anagram of the word "Wanker"?  I know, it took me a while to figure it out as well.  Anyway, I think its fair to say that I have long considered that this odius character should have been banished from the footballing world and his latest actions have done nothing to alter my opinion.

The moustached midfielder has recently come out using his Twitter account (or should that be Tw@tter?) to lay into recently sacked Neil Warnock.  Firstly, I would like to re-iterate that I don't really like Warnock either, mainly because of his undoubted role in the Battle of Brammall Lane. (link here for those are are unaware of this).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ZDsjY3uFdE

Another interesting fact for you is that Colin Wanker is an anagram of Neil Warnock, hence people who disliking him being affectionately calling him "Colin"

Anyway, enough of this idotic wordplay (this isn't Countdown after all) and back down to my latest rant which is that Joey Barton has completely overstepped the line and I have massive sympathy with my old pal Colin for a change.

Having watched footballers over years, I have noticed that there appears to be a sort of unspoken rule in football that a manager will never pick on one player in public. This happens 99.9% of the time in football , lets be honest.  Whether the manager then gives the player a bollocking behind closed doors is another matter, but they almost always support their public no matter how blatant the offence is.

This is why over the years we have had to put up with Wenger proclaiming he "didn't see it", Fergie blaming everyone from the groundsman to the referee and the likes of Dalglish supporting a player even when he commits a criminal offence in front of thousands.  The one thing these managers will never be seen to be doing is lambasting their player in public. This is something which has always been kept "in house." Managers almost definitely never air their dirty laundry in public.

With regards to Barton, he was picked up in the summer by Warnock when pretty much no one else would touch him with a barge pole and has been well supported by his manager ever since. For those who don't remember, Barton  is a convicted criminal and generally an all round bad egg. 

A prime example of  Warnock's support was a couple of weeks ago when Barton received a dubious red card and was backed by his manager to the hilt.

Which makes it more staggering to hear Barton's response to the Warnock's sacking .  Whilst his comments were not direct its pretty obvious that he was just basically slagging off Neil Warnock's managerial prowess and then had the irony to tell him to "look in the mirror".  Ha!  That's a bit like Jordan criticising Jodie Marsh for not wearing enough clothes!

There was absolutely no need for Barton to launch into this tirade and even if he did not rate Warnock's managment style the least he could have done was keep scthum to show some respect for the fact that Warnock both signed and has always backed him.

Neil Warnock has taken QPR from the Championship to the Premier League and had them outside the relegation zone when he was fired.  In the meantime, what has Barton contributed to football in in its entireity, let alone at QPR? Apart from give utterly useless opinions on Twitter, average performances week after week and generally just annoying all those around him?

Meanwhile, Warnock has shown a bit of grace and stated that he wont be getting involved in any arguments or discussions over this issue despite the fact he probably thinks deep down that Barton is a complete and utter C*nt ,which I think will leave everyone in no doubt as to who the real villain in this piece really is.

Sunil

Things Currently Annoying Me In Football....

Its been a while since I have posted anything remotely interesting so here is brief summary with all things that are annoying me in football these days

Roberto Mancini 

I have a lot of respect for Roberto for the following reasons;

1)  He was a brilliant striker
2)  He brought madcap Mario Balotelli to England
3)  No matter what the weather or situation he looks so suave in that scarf and coat you just cant help but admire his style (in a non homosexual way : but if you look at him that way thats no problem)

However, his recent whinge that he would struggle to fill his subs bench for the Man Utd game was simply laughable.  The guy has spent over £350m on his squad for crying out loud. He even has the luxury of signing players like Owen Hargreaves even though he has no intention of playing him.  What does he want us to do, have a quick whip round the office to help him out?  Simply ridiculous

Add to this his criticism of Wayne Rooney's card waving and it seems like Mancini is slightly losing the plot. Cast your mind back to the Man City Vs Liverpool game Roberto. Pot, kettle and black (or should that be N*grita?)

Here is a link to Mancini's moan about his squad depth

http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/news/Manchester-City-may-be-unable-fill-subs-bench-against-Manchester-United-as-so-many-players-are-out-article849586.html

One Footed Players

I am pretty sure that everyone will agree that football players are overpaid in a massive fashion.  However, one thing that infuriates me is that approximately 99% of players are incredibly rubbish on their other foot.  I mean, these guys have all week to train and none of them can be bothered to put in the extra 10% to practice with their crap leg.  I get fed up of seeing the likes of Stewart Downing or even my beloved Chris Brunt running halfway across the pitch because they cannot shift the ball sideways with their other foot or make a 5 yard pass with their right foot.  Here's some advice. Get practicising on the other foot and you may start becoming a better player!  Perhaps Downing might actually hit the target on the pitch rather than in real life (muhahaha-not condoning any sort of physical assault whatsoever)

The Return of Old Players

First it was Thierry, then it was Scholesy? When will the madness of these managers stop?  Are they going to bring back Eric Cantona and Tony Adams next? How about Steve Ogrizovic?  Henry recently had a statue built of him at Highbury and that will probably be just as mobile as Mr Henry's own performances in the next few weeks.  Farcical

Ray Wilkins

I will personally pay for a taxi for this man to the QPR job if it means getting him off my TV Screen.  MY WORD!

Commentators blaming Johnny Foreigner

Why oh why when we see a player diving or waving an imaginary card is it immediately stated that "people didn't do that in England before foreigners came over."  This lazy commentary has been bleated for years.  If people actually watched football in the 1970s and players such as Francis Lee, then people would realise that sort of behaviour has been going on long before the arrival of Johnny Foreigner.  Let's just accept that all players do it.  Do some You-Tubing of Joe Cole , Steven Gerrard and various other English folks to get the picture.

Sunil