Ramming It Home....

Liverpool 6 Derby 0

Liverpool leaped to the top of the Premiership table for the first time in 5 years with an emphatic destruction of a truly woeful Derby side. Liverpool rammed home 6 goals, and regardless of how bad the opposition were, you can’t deny that there is genuine quality in this Liverpool side. Scoring 10 goals in two games without your two best players is a good return. Derby were hopeless, and the sight of two Derby defenders tackling themselves for Liverpool’s second was truly comical, and with defending like that you have to wonder how long it will be before Derby are relegated. I think the word “ram” is such an apt nickname, because they will be getting shafted all season.

Man Utd 1 Sunderland 0

Man Utd really are not playing like Champions, they limped to an unimpressive 1-0 win against Sunderland. Roy Keane went back to his old club and received a great welcome, Sunderland continue to slide, but when you have signed 10 Man Utd rejects/old boys you are bound to struggle, but they defended brilliantly and Craig Gordon is a great acquistion. The impotency upfront for Man Utd was clear to see, and the introduction of Saha was the impetous they needed and he duly scored the winner. Anderson looked well out of his depth, and Nani failed to excite me again. I think their minds were still thinking about the prostitutes they were entertaining a few days earlier. Tevez still looks unfit, but when Ronaldo and Rooney return, and Saha gains full fitness, Man Utd will be a force again.

Arsenal 3 Portsmouth 1

Fabregas shockingly scored another league goal, and his 4^th goal this season. For a guy who has struggled to score in the league it’s clear that he’s maturing as a footballer, can he keep it up? Arsenal strolled to a relatively easy win which started with Adebayor slotting home a penalty after Van Persie was felled in the box. Even though they went down to 10 men, they still looked comfortable and even after Kanu’s bizarre goal made it 3-1, it was clear that the result was never in doubt. I’m not sure if Arsenal have enough to maintain a title challenge, a few injuries and they could really struggle.

Blackburn 1 Manchester City 0

Sven’s honeymoon period appears to be over as Rovers eased to a 1-0 win courtesy of Benni McCarthy’s close range strike. Blackburn are still unbeaten and are playing with the sort of consistency and quality that many people expected of Tottenham this season. Surely it won’t be long before Mark Hughes steps into Fergie’s boots? Or perhaps he may even be a target for Tottenham once Martin not so Jolly departs… watch this space.

Aston Villa 2 Chelski 0

Villa’s hoodoo over Jose Mourinho continued as Chelsea left the Midlands pointless. The Special One even resorted to getting his hairstyle changed before the game in an attempt to change his fortunes at Villa Park. Unfortunately for Jose, it made no difference and now he has just ended up looking like an idiot. A word of advice Jose, if it aint broke, don’t fix it. Chelski toiled at Villa without any real cutting edge, though it could have all been different if the referee had spotted Laursen’s attempted GBH on SWP in the first half. Without Fat Frank, Chelski were unable the resort to their tactic of getting Drogba to flick the ball on for the Fat one to hit a deflected winner. Ashley Young gave Belleti a torrid time as Villa grabbed what was probably a deserved three points, certainly in terms of clear cut chances.

Fulham 3 Tottenham 3

Diomansy Kamara’s shinned bicycle kick pushed Martin Jol one step closer to the sack as Tottenham once again pushed the self destruct button. I think Martin Jol should be called Santa Claus from now on, not just because of his rotund figure but also because he just loves handing out gifts. His decision to remove Robbie Keane proved pivotal, as the Irishman was running the game and the substitution handed Fulham the initiative. This was followed by the introduction of Michael Dawson as Jol pretty much said “we are trying our best to let you back into the game…so please oblige”. Fulham didn’t disappoint as they gained a point from a game in which Spurs completely dominated. Jol will have a lot of sympathy from the shambles of the Ramos affair but many will question whether he has the tactical ability to take Spurs to the next level, something which will almost certainly cost him his job.

Middlesborough 2 Birmingham 0

Goals from Wheater and Downing handed Boro an impressive win. Shame that there was no-one in the ground to witness it. A very poor attendance was the most notable thing during this game as well as Steve Bruce’s terrible attire. Stick to the tracksuit Steve.

Newcastle 1 Wigan 0

Michael Owen rediscovered his goal scoring touch as the Geordies snatched a last gasp win against a plucky ten man Wigan. Before everyone gets excited though, remember that Owen was up against Titus Bramble, not exactly the sternest test he is likely to face. I personally won’t be convinced until Michael gets 15-20 games under his belt.

Bolton 1 Everton 2

The Yak scored on his debut but it was Joleon Lescott who turned out to be the hero as he headed a last ditch winner at the Reebok. Everton have been excellent so far and look as though they could really be a force to be reckoned with this season, providing that they can keep their squad injury free. Another defeat for wee Sammy will do little to keep the vultures circling but the fact that Derby are already relegated may suggest that he may get some more time to stamp his authority on the Trotters.

Reading 0 West Ham 3

The Hammers gained revenge for last years six goal spanking as Bellamy and Etherington ran riot. Bellamy has shown that he can be a class player but it remains to be seen whether he can do it week in, week out. When things are going well, Bellamy will be fine. But if things aren’t going well, the hunchback is not the sort of person you want in your side when you are trying to scrap your way out of trouble. Not unless he is handed a golf club of course.