Itchy Feet....

Dedicated in loving memory to Martin Jol…..

Chairmen of premiership football teams are archetypal men. They’re easily bored, easily tempted and nearly always get caught with their pants down. Take the chairman of Tottenham, David Levy. Never mind the fact that Spurs have finished 5^th the last two seasons, Levy now wants a top 4 team. And he appears to doubt Martin Jol, his manager, is the man to give it to him.

Levy behaves like the leader of the cool gang in an American high school. Picture the scene: Levy in the playground surveying all the managers, suddenly realises he’s not satisfied with his simple high school hottie, Jol. He wants someone new, someone all the other chairmen will be jealous of. Enter Juande Ramos, the Sevilla manager. He’s hotter than Jol, much admired and exotic to boot. Levy wants him, and what Levy wants, Levy gets. Now he isn’t just going to stroll over and start chatting up Ramos. Firstly, he’s got a rep to protect, and secondly, he’s still got his current squeeze Jol knocking about. So he does what any self-respecting ‘cool’ gang leader would do, he sends over 2 of his minions to feel Ramos out. Naturally, though, in typical high school movie fashion, the minions aren’t exactly stealth. The illicit party are spotted together in a hotel. Excellent work boys! Now, Levy and co. can use Shaggy’s “I didn’t do it” line all they like, but Jol’s no fool and neither are we. Ramos whilst clearly embarrassed about being outed as ‘that kind’ of manager will no doubt get over it, and stand by his newly acquired man. I expect we’ll see the happy couple parading around White Hart Lane very soon.

So, clearly, football is a harsh game; barely 3 weeks into the premiership campaign and the big man from Holland looks like he’s on his way out. Not a fait a complis just yet, but, so sure are those in the know, his own wife has booked a late summer family holiday in September.

The only possible hope for Jol now, is a resounding thumping of Man United this Sunday. Granted, Man United are experiencing a bit of ‘mare at the moment, in that no one seems to want to score (a bit of a problem in this game), but Spurs just aren’t the sorts to kick a team when their down. They’re nice like that.

So, my suggestion: if you can find a bookie still taking bets, put a couple of quid on Martin to win the sack race. He’ll see you right.

Charlotte