Something For The Ladies.....

Tuesday, 7 August 2007

For all the girls out there that take an interest, but aren’t going to try and be sporty spice about it – my monthly round up all the Premiership shenanigans is for you. I’ll be keeping you up to date with what you really need to know, whose name to drop and what not to say around the office cooler on Monday morning.

It’s coming around again

We all know that long after the football season is over and the trophies have been won, the banter goes on and the speculation begins. The absence of any sun these last two months has meant that most of the papers, websites, men, have gone into a transfer-induced frenzy. There is however, no need to panic - we will not be memorizing all the new players. I think we can probably condense all those column inches, all those dead trees, into 3 main stories. These are the stories that you need to know if you are going to have any hope of properly getting into this season. I must also forewarn you, that my own allegiance may have had some bearing on the stories chosen, but really, I couldn’t care less.

Story one: Thierry Henry has left Arsenal to go to Barcelona.

This is important because Arsenal are beginning to look like a team with nowhere to go but down, but probably more so because it still burns all those Gooners out there. Consequently, fellow team mate Ljungberg has also jumped ship to join ‘I can’t believe they got away with it’ West Ham. The team is haemorrhaging. Will they be able to compete without their apathetic star? No!

Story two: Liverpool have signed Torres from Atletico Madrid.

This is big news because he is a record signing for them and because apparently he’s quite good. Earn brownie points in all conversations by musing over his ability to adapt to the Premiership quickly and whether he’s the missing piece of the jigsaw for Liverpool.

Story three: We have a tie for this one. Either choose the Tevez transfer saga – i.e. will he be playing for Man U or West Ham? (Nonchalantly mention the irony it was his goal against Man U on the last day of season that kept West Ham up for maximum impact) No doubt this story’ll still be rumbling on come the 11th August. Personally, I find the details far too tedious and the man far too ugly to give any more thought. So you should choose Spurs signing Darren Bent from Charlton. Spurs are a team on the up and Bent is home grown talent. It’s win-win.

So there you have it. Simply remember these 3 stories and you’ll be well versed for the evenings of entertainment with Lineker, Lawro and Hansen.

Catch you in a month girlies.


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