Cult Heroes....Part 4

Many footballers ,as well as being incredibly thick and having a limited vocabulary which means that they can only talk in cliches, are also blessed with good looks. Beckham, Redknapp (not Harry) and Ginola are a few names that spring to mind. However, the same cannot be said of our next cult hero, Sasa Curcic, former Bolton and Aston Villa legend. Let's face it, he wasn't exactly at the front of the queue when looks were handed out. In fact, I am not entirely sure that he made it to the queue, and was probably held up in a traffic jam. Poor bastard.

The Serbian superstar arrived in the Premiership in 1995 and was an instant hit with the Bolton fans, with his dazzling midfield runs and eye for goal. In fact, he scored one of the most memorable goals of all time with a fine individual effort at Stamford Bridge which announced his arrival in the Premiership. Unfortunately, for him and Bolton, his fine form waned over the course of the season, and Bolton were promptly relegated.

Aston Villa manager Brian Little subsequently spared Curcic from the lower leagues and snapped him up for the sum of £4m. Curcic's spell was nothing short of a disaster and he failed to get anywhere near the heights he reached at Bolton. Even his bum chum Savo Milosevic couldn't help him but lets face it, that would be a bit like going to a drug rehab clinic and finding that Linday Lohan was your supervisor (not that I would be complaining).

Curcic admitted he went off the rails at Villa Park and was taking as many drugs as Pete Doherty. However, unlike Pete Doherty, who managed to rip Kate Moss, Curcic's mug prevented him from attaining such beauties. So, following his transfer to Crystal Palace, he had a nose job, presumably to also help him snort cocaine a bit easier.


Curcic then moved on for a very brief spell in the MLS, where he proclaimed to be the new Dennis Rodman (yes, I am confused as well). I can only presume he has a dong like a baby's arm. It certainly can't be the fact that he married himself as Rodman did, because Curcic was so ugly and a divorce would quickly be on the cards. Imagine what the kids would have been like.

The Serbian retired in 2000 and did so with the following magical quote.


"I would not sign for another club, not even if I was offered 15 million dollars. However, it would be different if they were to instead offer me 15 different women from all around the world. I would tell the club chairman: 'Please let me make these women happy - I will satisfy them like they have never been satisfied before'."

For that alone he is a legend.

Curcic then bizarrely went on to win the equivalent of Celebrity Big Brother in his home country, so fair play to him.

Sasa Curcic...........WE SALUTE YOU!!!!!

Sunil